Never Too Late, Huh...

by Kenneth Bowie
(Compton)

So, first off, I'm an English major, and I use to want to teach and write. Possibly I will still teach later on, but I have been working at this warehouse for about 7 months now and have been stuck on what to do with my life. My anxiety is genuinely bad, and I have troubles connecting with people because of my social anxiety, which is why I put teaching on hold. Turns out I can't really see myself being and English teacher anymore, which got me thinking a lot. Well, to cut it shorter, at least, I picked up the guitar in September and have been practicing ever since. I've always had a huge love for music as I became more interested in it years and years ago. I just never thought I could make my own. You see, I wanted pick up the guitar years ago, and that didn't happen until I was 24 last year, Heh, I kind of forgot it was 2016 now. Now, all I can think about is getting better at guitar an being able to express myself through singing and making a career out of it, a honest one at that. I'm not looking to be this famous alternative star or rock star, but I have seriously been thinking about taking singing lessons and practicing my guitar. I've been wanting to get amazingly good at it because I have so much to say. It's kind of like I want to sing what is on my mind and in my heart but can't because I don't even have the most basic techniques for singing down, and on top of that my anxiety is horrible. I'm not as bad as Emily Dickinson, if you got that, but it's pretty terrible and has made breathing for me when i have tried to learn unbearable. I know I need music in my life and need to find my voice; it would mean so much to me, and I pray to God that it will happen naturally. I just feel I need this, especially after all I have been going through lately. Any advice for me? I'm kind of scared of starting so late because people will look down on me, but I know this is meant to be because I've always felt the need to get my word out there, to express myself, and to make a career out of it. Thank you for your time.